mischief night.

holding hands instead of holding grudges.
i like the way you hug me like you don't want to let go
and how our hands fit together just right.
now i don't even have to use that lame excuse
"how big are your hands?"
i can just grab yours any time i want.

really looking forward to tonight- please let's not mess it up.
just go for it. you know i'll let you but we're both afraid.
i know you don't like being all coupley in front of other people
but you make up for it so much when we're alone.
and i think i kinda like that we aren't the obnoxious couple that everyone is uncomfortable around.
mostly i think i just kinda like you.

ps. if i want to impress you, let me.

wake me before the trumpet sounds.

writing you from a bland classroom in a one story building in a no horse town.
(assuming anyone reads this i mean)

i keep going over this one conversation in my head- i mean seriously it's like all i can think about.

"i want always to be a boy and have fun"
"you say so, but i think it is your biggest pretend"

i think i know what you mean.

beep beep.

still can't believe i cried at the dentist's office.
they thought it was the needle.
too much pressure on the gums, he said.
more like too much pressure on the girl.
for the second time in two weeks, i cried around people i really knew.
dentist was my old neighbor.
he let me listen to his iPod which helped a decent amount.
nothing like blink-182 to soothe your nerves while someone shoves a drill in your mouth.

you know how in the life aquatic steve starts to cry and everyone puts their hand on his shoulders?
i kindof want that to happen to me.
i kindof don't though; as a general rule people aren't allowed to see me being human.

not sure, but i think i want to be the car accident
instead of just another traffic jam.